My last blog post was a little angry, and I definitely flew off the handle a bit. I probably offended some people in the process, and honestly probably contributed to the madness that was happening at the time -- despite the whole point being to encourage people to stop it. Instead of focusing on such things and letting the negativity fester inside myself, today I am thankful -- not just because it's Thanksgiving, but because I truly have many great things in my life to be thankful for.
I am thankful for my job. I don't make a ton of money, but I have flexibility to live life the way I want. Most importantly, I work with great people and absolutely love what I do -- it's fulfilling.
I am thankful for simple pleasures like coffee, yogi teas, wine, bourbon, potatoes (I have a problem), pasta, and pizza.
I am thankful for my family. I have really lucked out in this area of my life -- they're all pretty great. They've been my biggest fans and supporters through everything in my life -- big and small. I miss them all like crazy, but they've been awesome about staying in touch and keeping me updated. I can't wait to see them for Christmas.
I am thankful for simple pleasures like air fresheners, sheets washed with downy, swiffer products, and a good sweeper. It's the Danny Tanner in me.....I can't help it.
I am thankful for my tiny little self-made family: Will and Mozzie. They fill my life with love, laughter, and joy everyday. I am incredibly lucky to have these two boys in my life. They're also both pretty cute........ridiculous, but cute.
I am thankful for things like Amazon Prime, bikram yoga, Netflix, my fitbit, NPR programs, starbucks rewards, good internet, memes that make me laugh, and my "stories" like Once Upon a Time that have become guilty pleasures. None of these things are necessary, but they're wonderful luxuries that I'm very thankful for.
I am thankful for my future in-laws. I could not ask for a better family to become a part of. These amazing individuals welcomed me with open arms and have treated me like a long-lost daughter ever since.
I am thankful for my education and training, and the amazing musicians I've had the pleasure of training and working with over the years. I'm thankful for the love of music that my family instilled in me when I was young. It's such a huge part of who I am -- I can't imagine life any other way.
I feel like I haven't even scratched the surface with that list, but it's enough to put things back into perspective again. I am thankful for many things. I'm a happy and lucky girl.
Facebook is a terrifying place right now. This is the third presidential election I have been through while on Facebook, and it is by far the worst. I have not been totally silent about my dislike of how the election has gone, but I also have not gone on a rampage on social media like many others. Everyone is SO angry right now. Facebook is a literal sh*t storm of anger, insanity, immaturity, and everyone's "opinions." It's basically a bunch of monkeys throwing their poop at each other -- and it's exactly why Facebook should never have allowed anyone but college kids on their site. I don't really mean that, but yet I do.
My freshman class was the last round of college kids that entered Facebook when it was in its "purest form." Granted, Facebook remaining in that "pure form" would mean that I would no longer have access to Facebook.......but if that would reduce the amount of stupidity that is blowing up at least ONE part of the internet, it would be worth it. I would gladly revoke that "right." I'm not saying that college kids aren't also guilty of the insanity that is currently being posted, but people........the epic political posts, the propaganda, the memes that you think are funny that showcase your "opinions" you hold so dear, and the downright nastiness has got to stop. There's a difference between being active in politics and just being an a-hole. Unfortunately most people are the latter.
And those "opinions?" This is how I feel about them right now:
The reason why I don't want to hear them is not because I don't think you are entitled to them......it's because so many people are confusing their "opinions" with facts. Just because you believe something strongly does not make it a fact, and it certainly does not give you the right to treat others so poorly. I've seen families get in epic arguments on Facebook over this damn election. FAMILIES!!! It's embarrassing and appalling.
Look.......I didn't want Clinton OR Trump to end up in office. They both suck. SUCK. Every single election people talk about voting for the "lesser of two evils." The "lesser" depends on your opinion. That opinion you are allowed to have -- still not fact, but you are entitled to it. But when it comes down to basic human rights, you are NOT allowed to have an opinion on that. Basic human rights are not negotiable. Bottom line: one candidate was threatening those rights and one was not.
And forget about abortion........If I see one more person compare gay rights to abortion I'm going to scream. STOP. They are not the same. You cannot compare the rights of people who are currently existing in this world to the rights of those who do not. I digress..........
The bottom line is that unless you are one of the people that is going to be affected by the choice our country just made......STOP. Please.........stop.
I usually try to keep my posts positive and steer clear of things like this, but I'm angry too. It sucks that we're where we are -- it truly does. That is undeniable. It sucks that our political system is so broken and corrupt to where Clinton and Trump were the only candidates we could come up with. So where do we go from here???
All we can do is love and support each other. Regardless of how you voted or how you feel, I beg you.......please stop spewing hateful things. Stop getting into fights on social media. Stop making the people who are disappointed feel like they're wrong for being upset. They are upset for reasons you cannot possibly understand. Like with all presidential terms, we will get through this. But it will be a hell of a lot easier if we start treating each other as equals and stop the BS.
I feel like I'm teaching kindergarten......."Children.......CHILDREN!!!! Let's put on our listening ears. If you can't say something nice............." and all the children say, "don't say anything at all."
Jamie out. (*drops mic*)
I've posted before about my weight loss journey. And like all journeys, sometimes there are detours. And by detours I mean periods of time where a cheat meal turns into a cheat week -- or month.
Granted, I am a firm believer in not depriving yourself. So I believe that having a "cheat meal" here and there is a good thing. Personally, it keeps me sane. Sometimes I just really want a cupcake -- like REALLY want a cupcake -- and it ends up being better for me to just eat it. Otherwise I lose my mind and end up bingeing for an entire weekend. Regardless, I haven't exactly been living a "healthy" lifestyle since sometime around late May. Between getting a puppy, gigs, packing/moving, and spending as much time with friends and family as possible........I got off track. But then it was all about getting settled, finding a job, and a number of other excuses. To be honest, I just didn't want to put in the effort.
DIET TIP: Your pants will never get too tight if you don't wear any.
Don't listen to me -- that's terrible advice. I just thought it was funny. But I apparently followed that mantra for the past several months. My pants got tight. Ugh.
So my little detour resulted in gaining some of the weight back that I had fought so hard to lose. Fortunately the amount pales in comparison to the total that had been lost, so it's not the end of the world. BUT.......I will never let myself go the way that I did before. I won't go back to that place. That place sucked. So I'm back on track, but I'm paying for my little detour. It's super easy to break good habits, but really hard to form them. So here we are again.
Enter Advocare. This gem of a product line was what kickstarted my weight loss in the very beginning -- more specifically their 24-day challenge. It helps to zap the water weight you're carrying around then goes on to help you lose a little more to jump start your weight loss. It involves various supplements and such, but mostly focuses on clean eating. You're not supposed to have coffee, which I generally have every day, so that sucks..........and you're not really supposed to drink, especially in the first 10 days, which really blows. It's all water weight I'm sure, but I'm already down 5 1/2 pounds and today is only day 5. So that's cool.
Why am I telling you about Advocare? Because I'm selling it!!!
I'm totally kidding -- I'm not selling anything. Advocare just happens to be my catalyst of choice for getting back on track. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE fries, pizza, greasy chinese food, pasta, ice cream, cupcakes, and many more things that are not waistline-friendly......but eating that way all the time makes me feel terrible. As I'm re-learning, it's all about moderation. But more importantly, it's about loving myself enough to take care of myself.
When you think about it, unless you have some sort of medical condition that makes it difficult to maintain a healthy lifestyle, isn't not taking care of yourself a form of abuse? I know it is for me. Before I decided to make a change back in 2014, I didn't have enough respect for myself to treat my physical self well, which bled into other parts of my life. I didn't like who I was then. The detour I've been on these past several months, while temporary, was a glimpse into the past -- and I didn't like it.
So like I did in the beginning, I'm making a change and committing to loving myself again. A tea bag inspired me to write this post, believe it or not. I'm a big fan of Yogi teas, and I love that each tea bag has a positive message on it. This is what yesterday's morning tea said to me:
So whatever it is that you need to do to live with self-respect, don't make excuses, just do it. Love yourself. Only then can you truly love others.
Will and I have gone through a lot of stuff in the past few years that has made us re-evaluate what's really important in life. Maybe part of it is the big move, but we both seem to appreciate our relationship and our time together now more than ever.
It got me thinking about being with the "right person" and what that means. How do you know that you've found the right person to spend your life with? Are they "right" because you love them, you have things in common, they make you happy, etc.? Well yes, but what about the other reasons why they are the right person? Here are a few of mine, as unconventional as they may be:
1) When you are painfully aware that if people saw how you truly behaved together, you'd probably have no friends.
For example, there was a time where we were goofing around in the kitchen (I'm fairly certain I started it), and we started slapping each other on the butt -- back and forth and back and forth. At the exact same time we rushed each other, and simultaneously started slapping each other on the butt while chasing each other in a circle. It's about the equivalent of a dog chasing its tail. Really dumb.
2) When you realize you've been using the same loofa for 4 years and it's funny instead of gross.
I know that at face value using the same loofa DOES in fact sound gross, but hear me out. We have one of those shower caddies with hooks to hang your loofa on, and his has always hung on the left and mine on the right. It always seemed odd to me how my loofa would get worn out so fast and his wouldn't -- but regardless, I would always buy him a new one when I bought one for myself. About a month or so ago we were drinking and hanging out, and at some point I told him that I had bought him a new loofa. This is how the conversation went from there:
Will: "Yeah, I saw the new green loofa earlier. Thanks for that."
Me: "No.....yours is the blue one. Mine is the green one. I always get you blue or turquoise or something."
Will: "Wait.....isn't your loofa on the left?"
Me: "No......mine has always been on the right."
Will: "No.....MINE has always been on the right."
Me: "No.....YOURS has always been on the left -- I know because I'm the one who puts them there..............DUDE! You've been using my loofa!!! For how long???"
Will: (A sheepish look spread across his face) "Ummmmm......4 years???"
Me: "WHAT???!!! (*laughing*) You're kidding!!! No wonder mine always looks so worn out. You've never touched yours! I keep throwing out brand new loofas!!!"
I now use the loofa on the left as to not confuse him further. (*face palm*)
3) When you support each other's passions to the point where you geek out about it to someone else.
Will geeks out about marching band and DCI, and then I find myself carrying on long conversations with other people about it. At one point I realized what was happening, stopped, and asked that person, "I know way too much about this, don't I?" They just looked confused and nodded in agreement.
I'm loving my new work, and I gush about it on a regular basis to Will. He then turns around and gushes about it to someone else. He loves that I'm doing something that makes me feel good. It's actually pretty cool.
4) When you have your own dumb language, accent, etc.
Somewhere along the way the word "foot" became "fooht." "Chicken" and "chips" sound like "cheeken" and "cheeps." "Stick" is also "steek." I honestly have no idea how any of this came about or who started it -- it just did, and it stuck. It's a miracle that we don't butcher the words in public. Somehow it stays within the confines of our little bubble -- thank God. That combined with our weird behavior would surely make us social pariahs.
5) You don't care what you're doing as long as you get to spend time together.
Especially during really busy weeks, we go through a sort of "withdrawal" if we don't get to see each other much. And as much fun as it is to go out and do various things, we seem to always have the most fun just hanging out and talking -- even after 5+ years. I guess that's the advantage of being with your best friend -- as goofy as he may be. But I love that goofball with all of my heart and soul. I'm a lucky girl.
Let's talk about cleaning, shall we? You're super excited -- I know. Just try to contain yourself.
(Some of you actually probably already X-ed out of this post. Apparently you don't like things to be clean.)
Why did I choose this odd topic out of all the things I could be blogging about? Well, I care about it, for one, and regardless of my work situation there never seems to be enough time, which drives me nuts. But actually the main reason is because my cleaning habits, like other things in my life, have evolved over time.
I'm the kind of person who likes clean sheets on the bed each week, bed made every morning, no clothes on the floor -- everything put away in it's "proper place," everything dusted, any sign of unwelcome life (aka bugs) removed, floors swept and mopped (especially now that dog hair is involved). and absolutely no dirty dishes in the sink or on the counter. Granted, most people enjoy all of these things, but not enough to take the time to do them on a regular basis -- mostly because they're too damn busy and don't have the time or energy. I'm not as bad as I used to be, but I'm more likely than most to stress myself out by trying to cram all of those things in -- even if they can honestly be put off for a bit. It's the OCD.
My OCD cleaning habits originated at a young age (shout out to Dorothy -- I got this from you) and grew into a monster of a problem by the time I hit college. You may be wondering how being a clean freak could pose a problem. I'll explain in a minute, but just to give you an example...........at two different points in my life I had a falling out with two separate friends related to my cleaning OCD. It was actually about much bigger issues and us not being supportive of each other's life choices at the time, but the cleaning stuff was sort of the straw that broke the camel's back and initiated the fights. Regardless, when I was younger it was fine. It just meant that my car was clean, my room was clean, and I helped around the house.
The college years...........
Freshman year of college wasn't so bad. My freaky cleaning OCD hadn't truly taken hold, and I also happened to be paired up with an equally clean roommate. The next several years got progressively worse though.
Come sophomore year I was that a-hole that wrote passive aggressive notes on our shared white board (displayed on the outside of the triple dorm room). When you're in a shared space like that, it's hard to keep your little corner clean if someone else's stuff starts to expand beyond their area. So needless to say, I was frustrated, but I was also a dick about it.
Junior year was a completely different animal. We were in an on-campus apartment and there were four of us. Fortunately we had our own rooms, but there was a living room, dining room, kitchen, and 1.5 baths that made up the common space. This was my first living situation that wasn't living at home or in a dorm, so I was really excited to have a kitchen and have that first experience of "being on my own." I wasn't really, but it was a fantastic simulation.
Anyhow, the kitchen and the smell of the apartment in general became points of contention between me and my roommates. Once a week I would deep clean the common areas and I put air fresheners in probably every outlet I could find. My friends appreciated it, but also found it super annoying and excessive. And it turns out that they were right.
The biggest sore spot was always the kitchen. I was of the OCD mindset that dishes should be done immediately and nothing was to sit in the sink overnight. Two of my roommates didn't necessarily agree, but would eventually do the dishes. One roommate I don't think had ever touched a dirty dish in her life.........or done laundry..........or unclogged a toilet.............you get the idea. Sweet girl, but man.........her parents should've made her do some chores. She was not at all prepared for real life.
There were so many fights about such stupid things, and for what? Because I thought I was teaching my roommates life lessons? Or because I couldn't just calm down instead of letting insignificant things like dirty dishes stress me out? Whatever it was, it was dumb. And fortunately my friends forgave me for being such a psycho. I mean, they did like having a clean apartment, but to them it wasn't worth it if I was going to be a nazi about everything. I learned a lot from that.
Funny side note about the air fresheners: Years later over drinks, my one roommate admitted to me that she replaced the liquid in my air fresheners with colored water. She was sensitive to them, and I wanted them cranked up to 11. We actually got in a "taping" war" with the air fresheners. She kept turning them down, so I'd turn them back up and tape them there. Then she'd remove the tape, turn them back down and tape them.
Back and forth and back and forth. Psycho.............But I about died laughing when she told me what she had done. I have to admit that that was brilliant. Props, man......props.
As I've gotten older I've calmed down when it comes to cleaning. I still like things to my OCD specifications, but I don't get my panties in a twist if things aren't done perfectly or within the time frame I had planned. I do have my occasional tornado of cleaning if things have sat for too long (or if the mood strikes me and I have time). Will stays out of my way when that happens for fear of being trampled. He tells me I move way too fast and it freaks him out. I'm being "domestic." But he has clean sheets and clean clothes, so he can't complain.
Rounding back........just like with other parts of my life -- be it body image, my outlook on life in general, my priorities, etc. -- my cleaning OCD has evolved. I have realized that other things are more important, and it's okay if something else takes precedent over making sure the house is clean. Having things clean will always be important to me, but I won't be at the level of Danny Tanner. Who has time for that?
Sometimes things get messy, and that's okay...........as long as it's cleaned up in a timely fashion. Just kidding............well, sort of.
Not that I want to keep moving around the country like a nomad, but it's really interesting to me to be able to observe the differences (and similarities) between different areas. I went from Millersport (a small, one stop light town) to Columbus (a diverse and artsy city with great suburbs), to Nashville (touristy, VERY southern, and a terrifying place to drive), back to Columbus, and now to Port Isabel/South Padre Island, Texas.
A few differences I've noticed:
1) It is the "land of mañana." I did not make up this phrase, just to be clear. I have heard this from SO many people since we've moved down here, it's ridiculous. Granted, I noticed it myself pretty quickly, but it was nice to know that it's not just me and my impatient Northern ways. But that's the thing.......everything is so "go, go, go" where I come from that it's easy to forget how to slow down. In a lot of ways it's nice to be in the "land of mañana" -- less stress. Not everything is super important and some things can wait.
However, when it comes to people scheduling things in advance, businesses keeping normal hours, and information on websites being correct -- just to name a few -- good lord........the Northerner in me wants to break things.
2) No one cares about copyright -- no one -- especially the island area. It's incredible. They name things whatever the hell they want, use trademarked images, and use songs in ways that would get them major fines if we weren't so freakin' far south that no one cares. And that's their rationale -- no one cares because we're basically in our own little island bubble. They're not wrong, but still!
Let me give you an example........there used to be a restaurant called PadreRitaVille.........but Jimmy Buffett said hell no and they had to change it. That's probably the only time anyone here has gotten caught, but they also messed with the wrong guy. Jimmy owns everything island and kitschy.
3) Wine is infinitely cheaper down here. It's fantastic. Granted, not ALL bottles are, but I've noticed a pretty significant difference in several kinds that I've bought in the past. When I was in Tennessee for grad school I was pretty broke, so in order to satiate my wine craving I would buy the double bottles of Rex Goliath Cabernet Sauvignon. Don't judge -- it's one of the best cheap ones out there. To put it into perspective, the regular 750ml bottle in Ohio is generally $7-8. Well, a double bottle in Tennessee was $9.99. Oh yes...........And guess what? I'm in the South again, so it's $9.99 here too! Also, I found Kim Crawford Sauvignon Blanc for $7.99 at a nearby Target the other day. I was so excited at the register with my two bottles of wine (for less than the price of one in Ohio), that I'm fairly certain I had the kind of smile on my face my niece has when she sees chocolate. Southern state wine prices are awesome. AWESOME.
4) The weather, but that's a given. It's still in the 90s here. Beyond exercising, I have exclusively worn flip flops since we moved here back in July. I have a feeling I may be able to wear them year-round, or pretty close to it. Granted, this also means it's possible to get a sunburn around Thanksgiving and Christmas, but it also means year-round outdoor pool.................so that's cool.
A few similarities I've noticed:
1) It's a small town, so there are several similarities to my old stomping grounds.
2) Columbus will forever have a special place in my heart, and one of the main reasons is because of the people. There are so many wonderful and interesting people from all over -- many Columbus residents are not originally from the area (or even Ohio). One of my favorite things about this part of Texas is that there are a ton of transplants. Every chance I get I try to find out where people are from and why they're here. I've met a few Northerners, but the main reaction I get when people find out where I'm from is, "Wow. Big move. Is it too hot for you down here?" Then I have to explain that Ohio does in fact get sun -- we just have more drastic seasons than an area like this. Maybe they think Ohio is in Canada...........who knows...........
3) Our family and friends. Turns out, that even from over 1,500 miles away, that you're still awesome. Thank you -- all of you -- for being there during this transition. I'm super excited about future visits to Ohio, but I'm even more excited for you to come and visit us. We want you to see just how beautiful and special this place is. Hell, you may never want to leave. I mean, I wouldn't hate it if you moved........
Regardless of the differences and similarities, this is where we're at now. It's an adventure, it's beautiful, and who knows.......maybe it will officially become home. Or maybe not. We'll see. :)
So it's been awhile.......
You know the whole moving over 1,500 miles, looking for a job, trying to get established as a gigging musician in a new area (where you have no connections), trying to get back on the exercise train, and all the while having a puppy under 6 months old thing? Yeah......about that.........I am going to make a real effort to write more often, but damn. Honestly, I did you a favor. If I would have forced myself to write it would been a pile of blah, meh, and buh -- you feel me?
Anyway.....I've rejoined the living, so here goes........
I've been seeing a lot of posts from that "Happiness is..." calendar -- which is a great concept -- and I love that every time I see one it makes me slow down for a second. It makes me pause to think about the simple things that make my life rich and contribute to my overall happiness. I seriously need to buy one of these calendars, because talk about a GREAT way to start your day -- a simple reminder to enjoy and appreciate what you have.
So I decided to make my own "Happiness is..." list. Here are a few examples:
Happiness is a pug
Happiness is finding something great on the sale rack
(Or in Mozzie's case, cheap new toys from Amazon.com)
He put all 3 of his new toys on the couch in a pile. It was adorable.
Happiness is a good beer after work
Yes it's a pumpkin beer. Yes I'm a white girl. It's Fall and it's delicious. Get over it.
Happiness is feeling like your work matters
Granted, we've only been in Texas for about 2 months, but I'm finally employed!!! And not only that, but I really like what I'm doing and it's incredibly satisfying. I'm contributing to a cause that helps place homeless animals with loving families. I get to climb into the kennels and play with the cats and dogs, (*cough*) I mean take pictures of them (but also play with them), and work with some really great people -- all for a great cause. It's pretty awesome.
It's part time, but it also enables me to play music, which is my first love. Guess who got herself a weekly winter spot already lined up at an island bar? This girl -- that's who.
I have this gorgeous commute to work -- that's happiness
Will has been crazy busy with school and marching band stuff, so time together is limited. BUT.......we've been really enjoying the beautiful simplicity of just being together lately. So things like cuddling on the couch (even if it's just for a little bit), taking a walk with Mozzie and talking about our day, or just being able to eat a meal together (which is a rare thing) have become more special. More time would be nice, of course, but I'm happy we're slowing down in the moments that we do have in order to appreciate them.
This is from the "Happiness is" calendar, but I really like it, so I'm using it. It really puts things into perspective. I know that there are many times where I need to be reminded that my "problems" are not that big of a deal in the scheme of things. Not taking myself too seriously is the best advice I've ever been given -- hands down. I'm not fantastic about following it, but I'm trying.
Let's be honest.....loving and being loved is one of the best things in life.
Whether it's this kind of love....
Or this kind of love....
There are so many other "happiness is" examples I could throw at you (maybe I'll do a part 2 at some point)......I'm a pretty lucky girl. So what is happiness? Well, I guess it depends on your definition.
To me, when you really get down to it, happiness is slowing down to appreciate and enjoy life. Period.
Let's talk about unemployment for a bit, shall we?
I think we can all agree that there are good and bad things about being unemployed. Mostly bad, because of the lack of income, but there's part of me that also feels like I'm on a weird sabbatical right now -- which isn't all that bad. I get to set my own schedule, I have time to workout and cook, I can work on music and write (although I'm yet to really do that.....bad musician.....bad!), I can explore the area, I can read books, etc. Regardless, for the many pros that I've found, I've also found many cons.
1) No income = BAD
2) No set wake up time = GOOD
3) Hard to establish a sense of purpose = BAD
4) Being able to work out at any point in the day = GOOD
5) Applying for jobs is frustrating = BAD
6) I cook WAY more = GOOD
7) I go a little stir crazy = BAD
8) I get to enjoy the pool = GOOD
9) I get to hang out with Mozzie = GOOD
10) I'm stuck with Mozzie = BAD
It's good and bad. Part of me is really enjoying the time off -- truly. But part of me also yearns for more of a set routine, so I'm excited to get back out there and do the things. You know, the things and stuff.
Just a few things I thought I'd share:
1) The DMV will always be a pain in the butt........no matter where you live.
Patton Oswalt has a bit on his newest special about how the DMV doesn't make things difficult, but that we do because we don't follow directions. So he's mocking someone who gets the registration renewal letter in the mail by saying, "I got a letter, and it has an eagle on it. Do I get an eagle? Because I can't take care of an eagle."
It's actually pretty funny..........check it out.
He's right. It's not the DMV employees' faults that things are difficult and there is so much red tape. They didn't make the rules, and if they seem annoyed, it's because the rules are stupid and they have to deal with pissed off customers all day. Regardless, Patton is specifically talking about the annual registration renewal. That's easy. You get a thing in the mail that tells you what to do, and you can even do it online now. Easy.
Transferring a title, registration, getting a new license, and doing it all in a new state with different rules, however........turns out it's a giant pain in the butt. There may be an instruction sheet for registration renewal, but there is no clear "guide" for any of the other crap. No matter how much reading I did leading up to getting all of this getting taken care of, the rules and the forms I needed were not clear. Some of the form links were broken on the state website, which was awesome. I had to guess on which forms I would need, and I even printed off ones I thought might be relevant -- just maybe -- just in case. One of them I didn't need, but one of them I definitely did. I found it by accident and didn't even think it was totally necessary, but it was. It even had to be notarized. (That piece of paper in itself was a whole other pain in the butt.......I had to pay twice to get the damn thing notarized -- long story.)
Stupid, stupid, stupid.........
2) Applying for jobs will always be a long, tedious process that sucks hours out of your life.
I gave myself the first week in Texas to unpack, get situated, explore the area a bit, and do things like go to the pool that's within walking distance.
Yes, I realize that I mentioned the "pool within walking distance" in my last post, but I don't think you realize how awesome this is. If you're jealous, you should be. Hate me -- it's fine.
But after taking that first week off, I've hit the ground running with trying to get my car stuff taken care of and applying for as many relevant jobs as possible.
I had forgotten how much time gets sucked out of your day by applying to even one job, let alone several. They want SO much information -- beyond employment history and education and such.
Several of them have wanted the addresses of where I've lived for the past 10 years. If you read the post where I recounted how many times I've moved in the past 10 years.............there's no freaking way I could accurately do that. I don't think they'd have enough boxes for that anyway. I'd make it back to maybe 22, but not to 18. Ugh.
My favorite, common online application "feature," if you will, is the one where it won't let you move onto the next section until you fix what's wrong, but they don't tell you what's wrong. Generally it's something to do with the system not liking your use of a symbol, number or whatever, but there are no instructions anywhere to be found that say what you can and can't enter into the boxes. Mozzie thinks I'm yelling at him when I yell, "Tell me what you want!!!" at the computer. It's a fun back and forth of, "Oh come the eff on!!! Oh no, not you Mozzie. Come here buddy.......I love you.............Okay, let's try it without the dollar sign. Okay (*through gritted teeth), let's take out the dashes. SERIOUSLY???!!! Tell me what you want!!!"
I've lost count of how many jobs I've applied for at this point........my brain hurts............
I have had a few serious bites though. So things are looking up. Yay!
But I still hate applying for jobs..........
3) Will is awesome.
Will has been crazy busy between band camp from 8am-4pm and writing what seems like all the drill in the world. He's been writing SO much that he's been working what would be the equivalent of pulling 5 doubles in a week. Why? Well, there is a lot of work to do, but he's been working overtime so we can have Friday night and an entire weekend day together. So he's been busting his butt to spend quality time with me.
I had a bad day last week. It was the epic DMV day where I walked into the same place 5 times trying desperately to get everything done (and called 3 times), plus I got three job rejection emails. Getting rejected is never a good feeling, but this was infuriating, because the reasoning was that I "didn't meet the minimum qualifications." I was definitely over-qualified for each position, in every way, but those were the emails I got.
There were some other dumb things that happened, but I'll spare you the details. It was just one of those days where things keep compacting, until something really small pushes you over the edge and you have no idea why you're crying.
Oh, Mozzie was also being a giant a-hole that day. That dog had gone NUTS.
Regardless, Will had a ton of work to get done that night, but instead, he took me to dinner so we could have some time and talk about what was bothering me.
I'm fairly certain the conversation went something like this:
Will: So what's going on?
Me: (*trying to fight back tears*) I'm just.....having...........
Will: A rough day?
Me: (*sniffle*) Yeah.
Will: Okay. Well let's get you some food. You always feel better after you eat. Are you hungry?
Me: (*sniffle*) Yeah.
Will: What do you want to eat?
Me: (*starts crying*)
NOTE: I'm very indecisive when it comes to food. I was clearly overwhelmed at the moment, so the thought of making a decision about freaking food made me cry. Oy.........
Will: I'll find us something. Don't you worry.
He gets me and knows how to deal with my crazy. He's awesome.
The DMV and applying for jobs have got to be two of my least favorite parts about adulting, you know, besides paying bills and stuff. But speaking of adulting........spiced rum is cheap down here for some reason, limes are DIRT cheap (seriously, I bought 10 limes for $1 today), and I've been in a Cuba Libre kind of mood. To cheap rum!!! Huzzah!!!
So we made it to Texas. Holy crap was that a long drive............9.5 hours the first day. 10 the second day, and 5.5 the third day. I never want to drive again. Ever. But we're here.
Well, technically we made it on July 11th, but I needed some time to unpack, decompress, and sleep, which is why my writing has been on hiatus for a bit.
For the love of God.........sleep............it's such a wonderful thing. I've been missing it SO badly for the past month or so.
But we're here...........and it's beautiful. The condo is exactly like the pictures and the pool that always feels like bath water is a two minute walk away. There are palm trees everywhere and the beach is within walking distance.
There's a catch though..........turns out the beaches in Laguna Vista and Port Isabel aren't for swimming and such -- they're for fishing. So we can technically walk to the beach, but not the right kind of beach. So we have to drive a whole 25 minutes to get to the beaches on South Padre Island.
Ugh. Life is so hard. (*sigh*)
If you want to punch me right now, I totally understand. I'm not really whining about having to drive to the beach, just for the record. I just felt like being an a-hole. A 25 minute drive is freakin' awesome. And we're finally going to go to the beach today. Yay!
If you still want to punch me, I also understand. I think this is where I say "neener neener neener." Or something to that effect.
Everyone has been incredibly nice and hospitable so far. Our neighbors are great and everyone in our community waves at you, even if they don't know you. Things also seem to be slower paced down here, which is actually a really nice change. The stress of the constant "go, go, go" mentality was starting to wear on me. Granted, we've only been down here for 2 weeks, but the vibe is just different. You can feel it. It's nice.
So while I'm looking for work, I'm getting back on the exercise train and enjoying the sun. I fell off that train so hard while we were packing and moving. I think I gained about 10 pounds through everything. Stress, fast food, not enough time for exercise, and drinking with friends................I drank more beer during the month leading up to moving than I have in a long, LONG time.
Case and point, I am certainly not beach ready. But I feel like I'm sort of on vacation at the moment, so I don't care. Everyone will just have to deal with my extra 10 pounds and my pasty northern ass. Imma enjoy the beach in my bikini as I please -- thank you very much.
I actually have already lost a few pounds since we've been here, but it's probably just the sun zapping my water weight, which is cool. Regardless -- definitely getting back on the exercise train. Woof.
Fun thing I discovered................
Want to know how to make an already needy dog even needier? Move. But before you officially move, confuse the hell out of him by crashing at a friend's place for a few days, then going to a cottage on the lake, then to your future in-laws' place, then to your parents' house for a week. But if you REALLY want to top it off, put him in a car for 3 days, sprinkle a couple hotels in there, and then stick him in an unfamiliar place with crunchy grass and palm trees.
BOOM. Needy dog becomes the neediest of all dogs. Mozzie is my freakin' shadow. I can't pee without him following me into the bathroom. If I try to go without him, he scratches at the door and whines. If I leave for an hour to exercise..........oh my god........the way he acts when I come back.......you would think he'd been alone the entire day. It's insane. He's real cute, and I love him to death, but he's definitely confirmed that I am not ready for children anytime soon. Whoa.
Anyhow............more on Texas later. Imma go to the beach, son! Jamie out.
This is the front of our condo. There is a palm tree right outside the front door. It's awesome.
I'm an "adult," or so I've been told. I do "adult" things, I have an "adult" job, I pay bills, and I drink bourbon and wine. I have great friends and family, an amazing husband, and generally a pretty good life. I have achieved many things, yet so little at the same time. I'm in my 30s, yet I feel more clueless than when I graduated college. This is how I "adult."