JAMIE WELLS (WHETSTONE)
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So this is "adulting"...

The pros and cons of unemployment

8/17/2016

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​Let's talk about unemployment for a bit, shall we?

I think we can all agree that there are good and bad things about being unemployed. Mostly bad, because of the lack of income, but there's part of me that also feels like I'm on a weird sabbatical right now -- which isn't all that bad. I get to set my own schedule, I have time to workout and cook, I can work on music and write (although I'm yet to really do that.....bad musician.....bad!), I can explore the area, I can read books, etc. Regardless, for the many pros that I've found, I've also found many cons. 

1) No income = BAD
  • This one is obvious. It sucks when you don't have those stupid pieces of paper that "make the world go 'round." Fortunately Will and I have functioned as a married couple for years, so when one of us is in a financial slump the other steps up to help out. Regardless, not having money sucks. 

2) No set wake up time = GOOD
  • This part is awesome. Well, it would be awesome if Mozzie would let me sleep in. Usually I get bopped in the face with a paw (and scratched Monday morning -- apparently I need to trim his nails) and then the whining at the edge of the bed ensues. But on the occasional days that he does let me sleep longer.........oh yes..............sleep is glorious. That alarm clock being a "hey, get your lazy butt out of bed" alarm, instead of a "get up so you can get to work on time and not get fired" alarm is super freeing. 

3) Hard to establish a sense of purpose = BAD
  • This is tough. Beyond being a musician, I don't think any of my jobs have ever "defined" me, per se, but I can't deny that there is a certain level of self-realization when the work I'm doing fills a certain void. That void could be the work itself and feeling proud of what I'm accomplishing, the social aspect of being with certain types of people, feeling like I'm contributing financially to the household, etc. 

4) Being able to work out at any point in the day = GOOD
  • ​I do really like this aspect of being unemployed. Days where work and everything else would get too crazy, depriving me of my workout, would make me feel guilty and ultimately stress me out. When "time is mine" and I can schedule the day how I like, I get to do the workout I want when I want. Although the other side of that is that there's really no excuse to not workout. So the days that I haven't I've felt EXTRA guilty. (*sigh*)
    • I got really excited when I found an audio version of a bikram yoga class since there aren't any studios nearby. Also, I have a screened in porch with a tile floor, and it's hot, because you know....it's Texas and all......so it's perfect for bikram. But even if I shut the blinds and put the TV on to throw Mozzie off my trail, he eventually figures out where I've gone, and either whines, or barks at me while furiously scratching the door. He's SO needy.

5) Applying for jobs is frustrating = BAD
  • I've already whined about this before. It sucks. It just sucks. End of story.

6) I cook WAY more = GOOD
  • ​I love cooking. It's therapeutic for me, plus I'm good at it. Even Will made this comment a couple weeks ago: "You've always been a good cook, but lately I feel like you've had a cooking renaissance. Everything has been amazing." My response was, "Well yeah....I actually have time to do creative things instead of throwing stuff in the crock pot." 

7) I go a little stir crazy = BAD
  • I don't do well with stir crazy. Well, at least not for extended periods of time. I've always considered myself a pretty friendly person -- I'll strike up a conversation with most types of people, but when I live close to friends I generally don't have the desire to have long conversations with random people. Well..........lately I have found myself striking up conversations with random people, with the intent of it being a longer conversation. My fireproof way to get them to talk to me (that sounds way more pathetic now that I've typed it) is to tell them I'm new to the area and ask them where I should go, what I should do, etc. Everyone has an opinion -- so we talk for awhile, or sometimes for a long while depending on the person. It's actually kind of fun. It's a relatively small town, so it's good to get to know a lot of these people anyway. Plus, that part is sort of comforting since I'm originally from a small town where you know everyone. 
    • Grocery shopping has become an exciting thing because it means I'm getting out of the house. Let me repeat that sad statement.......grocery shopping has become an exciting thing...........(*face palm*) Now, I can leave the house anytime I want and go exploring, but honestly I feel guilty leaving Mozzie for extended periods of time at this point. I guess I need to get over that, you know, if I want to have a social life or something.

8) I get to enjoy the pool = GOOD
  • Once a week I try to go to the pool in the middle of the day. That's the time where the retirees are out, soaking up the sun and drinking beer, before the working crowd and the kids come around. They sit in the pool with their pool noodles and other various floaty things, big hats and sunglasses, and loaded beer koozies, and kibitz with each other. Several weeks ago I was observing this for the first time while I was reading a book in the sun. I eventually got into the pool, and one of them turned around to introduce herself (but mostly find out who I was and why I was there). I talked with several of them for at least an hour, and they gave me all kinds of great tips on the area and what goes on at different times of the year. It was nice. Most weekdays the same faces show up around the same times. So I make an effort to get to know them since we live in the same community. 

9) I get to hang out with Mozzie = GOOD
  • I love that dog. He's adorable, he's probably 95% potty trained at this point, and he provides some company. Granted, that generally means he's either asleep on me or next to me, or I'm playing tug of war or throwing a ball of some sort, but still. He's cute. 

10) I'm stuck with Mozzie = BAD
  • Sometimes that dog is a sh*t. He's still a puppy, but man does he have a stubborn streak.......
    • The most frustrating part is that he's smart enough to know what he's not supposed to do, but every once in awhile he goes into full on gremlin mode and attempts to eat the house. It's in those moments where he decides to mess with every single thing he knows he's not supposed to mess with. I've been getting some mad steps in just by chasing him around the damn house. 
    • Or he'll be awesome going outside without a leash for an entire day, and then the next day he thinks it's fun to run into the neighbor's backyard and make me awkwardly chase him.
    • He also does the ever-so-fun toddler game where you know they have to go to the bathroom, because they're holding their crotch, but they refuse to stop playing. So you try to get them to go to the bathroom, but they keep insisting they don't have to, and then they piss their pants. Mozzie doesn't wear pants, but you get the idea. 

It's good and bad. Part of me is really enjoying the time off -- truly. But part of me also yearns for more of a set routine, so I'm excited to get back out there and do the things. You know, the things and stuff. 



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Just a few things I thought I'd share

8/3/2016

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Just a few things I thought I'd share:

1) The DMV will always be a pain in the butt........no matter where you live.

Patton Oswalt has a bit on his newest special about how the DMV doesn't make things difficult, but that we do because we don't follow directions. So he's mocking someone who gets the registration renewal letter in the mail by saying, "I got a letter, and it has an eagle on it. Do I get an eagle? Because I can't take care of an eagle."
It's actually pretty funny..........check it out.
He's right. It's not the DMV employees' faults that things are difficult and there is so much red tape. They didn't make the rules, and if they seem annoyed, it's because the rules are stupid and they have to deal with pissed off customers all day. Regardless, Patton is specifically talking about the annual registration renewal. That's easy. You get a thing in the mail that tells you what to do, and you can even do it online now. Easy. 

Transferring a title, registration, getting a new license, and doing it all in a new state with different rules, however........turns out it's a giant pain in the butt. There may be an instruction sheet for registration renewal, but there is no clear "guide" for any of the other crap. No matter how much reading I did leading up to getting all of this getting taken care of, the rules and the forms I needed were not clear. Some of the form links were broken on the state website, which was awesome. I had to guess on which forms I would need, and I even printed off ones I thought might be relevant -- just maybe -- just in case. One of them I didn't need, but one of them I definitely did. I found it by accident and didn't even think it was totally necessary, but it was. It even had to be notarized. (That piece of paper in itself was a whole other pain in the butt.......I had to pay twice to get the damn thing notarized -- long story.)

Stupid, stupid, stupid.........
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​2) Applying for jobs will always be a long, tedious process that sucks hours out of your life. 

I gave myself the first week in Texas to unpack, get situated, explore the area a bit, and do things like go to the pool that's within walking distance. 
Yes, I realize that I mentioned the "pool within walking distance" in my last post, but I don't think you realize how awesome this is. If you're jealous, you should be. Hate me -- it's fine.
But after taking that first week off, I've hit the ground running with trying to get my car stuff taken care of and applying for as many relevant jobs as possible. 

I had forgotten how much time gets sucked out of your day by applying to even one job, let alone several. They want SO much information -- beyond employment history and  education and such. 
Several of them have wanted the addresses of where I've lived for the past 10 years. If you read the post where I recounted how many times I've moved in the past 10 years.............there's no freaking way I could accurately do that. I don't think they'd have enough boxes for that anyway. I'd make it back to maybe 22, but not to 18. Ugh.

My favorite, common online application "feature," if you will, is the one where it won't let you move onto the next section until you fix what's wrong, but they don't tell you what's wrong. Generally it's something to do with the system not liking your use of a symbol, number or whatever, but there are no instructions anywhere to be found that say what you can and can't enter into the boxes. Mozzie thinks I'm yelling at him when I yell, "Tell me what you want!!!" at the computer. It's a fun back and forth of, "Oh come the eff on!!! Oh no, not you Mozzie. Come here buddy.......I love you.............Okay, let's try it without the dollar sign. Okay (*through gritted teeth), let's take out the dashes. SERIOUSLY???!!! Tell me what you want!!!"

I've lost count of how many jobs I've applied for at this point........my brain hurts............
I have had a few serious bites though. So things are looking up. Yay!
But I still hate applying for jobs..........
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​3) Will is awesome.
​

Will has been crazy busy between band camp from 8am-4pm and writing what seems like all the drill in the world. He's been writing SO much that he's been working what would be the equivalent of pulling 5 doubles in a week. Why? Well, there is a lot of work to do, but he's been working overtime so we can have Friday night and an entire weekend day together. So he's been busting his butt to spend quality time with me. 

I had a bad day last week. It was the epic DMV day where I walked into the same place 5 times trying desperately to get everything done (and called 3 times), plus I got three job rejection emails. Getting rejected is never a good feeling, but this was infuriating, because the reasoning was that I "didn't meet the minimum qualifications." I was definitely over-qualified for each position, in every way, but those were the emails I got.
There were some other dumb things that happened, but I'll spare you the details. It was just one of those days where things keep compacting, until something really small pushes you over the edge and you have no idea why you're crying.
Oh, Mozzie was also being a giant a-hole that day. That dog had gone NUTS. 

Regardless, Will had a ton of work to get done that night, but instead, he took me to dinner so we could have some time and talk about what was bothering me. 

I'm fairly certain the conversation went something like this:
Will: So what's going on?
Me: (*trying to fight back tears*) I'm just.....having...........
Will: A rough day?
Me: (*sniffle*) Yeah.
Will: Okay. Well let's get you some food. You always feel better after you eat. Are you hungry?
Me: (*sniffle*) Yeah.
Will: What do you want to eat?
Me: (*starts crying*) 
NOTE: I'm very indecisive when it comes to food. I was clearly overwhelmed at the moment, so the thought of making a decision about freaking food made me cry. Oy.........
Will: I'll find us something. Don't you worry.
He gets me and knows how to deal with my crazy. He's awesome.


​The DMV and applying for jobs have got to be two of my least favorite parts about adulting, you know, besides paying bills and stuff. But speaking of adulting........spiced rum is cheap down here for some reason, limes are DIRT cheap (seriously, I bought 10 limes for $1 today), and I've been in a Cuba Libre kind  of mood. To cheap rum!!! Huzzah!!!
​
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    Jamie

    I'm an "adult," or so I've been told. I do "adult" things, I have an "adult" job, I pay bills, and I drink bourbon and wine. I have great friends and family, an amazing husband, and generally a pretty good life. I have achieved many things, yet so little at the same time. I'm in my 30s, yet I feel more clueless than when I graduated college. This is how I "adult."

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